I’ve been divorced FOUR times: Twice to narcissists.
And I’ve stopped the vicious cycle.
No doubt, I didn’t love myself enough to NOT get lured into the idealization and love bombing of a narcissist. And then when the devaluation hit as it always does, I didn’t love myself enough to NOT put up with it.
And when they finally discard you (which happened to me), it’s a tough blow to your heart and soul.
This is the way of the narcissist: Idealize, Devalue and Discard.
Rinse and repeat.
It’s hard to believe they’ll do it because we believe the words of a pathological liar, but it’s part of the cycle.
For me, I could say that growing up in an alcoholic environment, my dad moving away when I was a teenager (never to be seen again), and an alcoholic step father who died shortly after, probably contributed to a lack of self worth. (No blame here.)
And on I went down the relationship road trying to fill the void, choosing partners for the wrong reasons, and sticking it out longer than I should have in the face of things that I shouldn’t have tolerated.
At the tender age of 60, here’s my advice: Don’t waste your time like I did.
And don’t allow someone to ABUSE and damage your heart and soul.
You’re not here to fix someone else. They can only fix themselves. And with narcissists, unfortunately it’s very unlikely they’ll admit they need help.
Begin loving yourself NOW. Get the help YOU need now.
Do things to lift your self-esteem, otherwise, you’ll keep attracting the wrong person.
If you don’t love yourself, then no one else will.
Life is short. If you were your own best friend, what advice would you give yourself? Journal on that.
Become YOUR best friend, and don’t take any crap from anyone.
You’re a powerful spiritual being with dignity, direction and purpose.
When you see yourself that way, things will change for the better. And the people that don’t deserve you will fall way.
Do it now.
We can only work on ourselves, and that’s what life is about in this big school we’re all in.
To learn from our experiences.
P.S. Looking to get unstuck and find your direction in life? Book your complimentary Clarity Call and get the abundant clarity you need to know your exact direction now.